This term we have been looking at ways to make our writing more interesting for the reader.

We have used the following criteria to guide us:

• Changing the word order of a sentence
• Using literary devices such as metaphor, simile, alliteration, onomatopoeia and  personification
• Using specific verbs and adjectives
• Using  show, don’t tell techniques
• Using different sentence beginnings and lengths

Here are some examples of my writing this term.

Show Don’t Tell- Emotions

Excited : My arms flung high in the air with my huge smile when Poppa got out of hospital he had been gone for nearly 7 months and I missed his warm hugs and I felt like my arms would never let go of him.

Angry: I hate him! Shut up, Go away, You suck, I hate you! I’m sick of it. If he wasn’t such a pain I could probably live with it but he just has to be such a pain. I locked myself in my room and roared like a bear, I felt like throwing him through a wood chipper. My  face was a deep red colour and I felt like the hulk suddenly. I could run outside and knock a house over just like that.

Sad: Granny don’t go, I love you. But granny just laughed and told me that whatever comes must go. Mum came up to me and gave me a hug! Then granny’s heart measure stopped going. Granny noo! Tears rolled down my cheeks and I fell on the floor like I had died too. Which my heart had. Granny had been there for me my whole life and now she was gone.

Writing to music

Shakespeare had found an old deserted maze. Obviously there was  some sort of fierce living creature in there. Anxious to explore more, he started to tremble and shiver. Knowing that he would only get paid if he had written his music by Thursday, Shakespeare entered. If he could be chased that could just inspire him to write the perfect piece. Taking a step forward again and again and again and again he was soon walking through an old maze. His legs took him in and out in and out in and out in and out. Over walls and under trees under under trees over walls and to a humongous den covered in bones. He soon  came across a rather large pussy. Gulpp, Shakespeare had been worried this might happen. Nice kitty .Looking at the kitty Shakespeare started to scream. Ahhhhhh ,the cat chased him down a looooooooooooooooong tunnel covered in dead body animals. Gulp, that was definitely what Shakespeare was trying to avoid. He soon came to a huge round arena, the cat was challenging him to a jewel. what? Dun dun, dun dun, duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunn.

Music: In The Hall Of The Mountain King

The Boy

Slowly Jeff walked down the footpath not caring to look back at his old friends, he didn’t need them he could make new friends. Jeff came home crying and sat on his bed feeling all shrivelled and old like no one cared about him anymore. Jeff squealed and alerted his mum was not in a good mood. “What’s wrong Jeffy?” “My friends stink like rotten bananas!”

Viking Girl

“AHHHHH STOP IT!” Lucy’s face was like a Lion being teased by an ant. Her eyes are dark like a cold winter's night and she was in no mood to talk. “Lucy calm down!” Lucy came out of her room and her gave her mum a big slap on the arm. “OOW!”. “ Why can’t Joseph stop being such a pain in the bum it’s like living with a Monkey, Except Joseph is even more annoying!

By Ben