This term we have been looking at ways to make our writing more interesting for the reader.

We have used the following criteria to guide us:

• Changing the word order of a sentence
• Using literary devices such as metaphor, simile, alliteration, onomatopoeia and  personification
• Using specific verbs and adjectives
• Using  show, don’t tell techniques
• Using different sentence beginnings and lengths

Here are some examples of my writing this term.

Show Don’t Tell- Emotions

Excited : My arms flung high in the air with my huge smile when Poppa got out of hospital he had been gone for nearly 7 months and I missed his warm hugs and I felt like my arms would never let go of him.

Angry: I hate him! Shut up, Go away, You suck, I hate you! I’m sick of it. If he wasn’t such a pain I could probably live with it but he just has to be such a pain. I locked myself in my room and roared like a bear, I felt like throwing him through a wood chipper. My  face was a deep red colour and I felt like the hulk suddenly. I could run outside and knock a house over just like that.

Sad: Granny don’t go, I love you. But granny just laughed and told me that whatever comes must go. Mum came up to me and gave me a hug! Then granny’s heart measure stopped going. Granny noo! Tears rolled down my cheeks and I fell on the floor like I had died too. Which my heart had. Granny had been there for me my whole life and now she was gone.

Writing to music

Shakespeare had found an old deserted maze. Obviously there was  some sort of fierce living creature in there. Anxious to explore more, he started to tremble and shiver. Knowing that he would only get paid if he had written his music by Thursday, Shakespeare entered. If he could be chased that could just inspire him to write the perfect piece. Taking a step forward again and again and again and again he was soon walking through an old maze. His legs took him in and out in and out in and out in and out. Over walls and under trees under under trees over walls and to a humongous den covered in bones. He soon  came across a rather large pussy. Gulpp, Shakespeare had been worried this might happen. Nice kitty .Looking at the kitty Shakespeare started to scream. Ahhhhhh ,the cat chased him down a looooooooooooooooong tunnel covered in dead body animals. Gulp, that was definitely what Shakespeare was trying to avoid. He soon came to a huge round arena, the cat was challenging him to a jewel. what? Dun dun, dun dun, duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunn.

Music: In The Hall Of The Mountain King

The Boy

Slowly Jeff walked down the footpath not caring to look back at his old friends, he didn’t need them he could make new friends. Jeff came home crying and sat on his bed feeling all shrivelled and old like no one cared about him anymore. Jeff squealed and alerted his mum was not in a good mood. “What’s wrong Jeffy?” “My friends stink like rotten bananas!”

Viking Girl

“AHHHHH STOP IT!” Lucy’s face was like a Lion being teased by an ant. Her eyes are dark like a cold winter's night and she was in no mood to talk. “Lucy calm down!” Lucy came out of her room and her gave her mum a big slap on the arm. “OOW!”. “ Why can’t Joseph stop being such a pain in the bum it’s like living with a Monkey, Except Joseph is even more annoying!

By Ben

This is my last 100 word story.

It was a sunny day in Glenside. Glenside outdoor pools was crowded with happy children swimming and diving. Towards the end of the day as the sun set down the pool became green and the air smelled of gas. The lifeguard instructed everyone to get out of the pool. As if it were the flash a body sped past the hydro slide and dived into the pool. “What are you doing?” asked the lifeguard. A mysterious looking figure got out dressed as a dancer. It was likely he wanted something but the lifeguard couldn't work it out.

This is another 100 word story I did.

I was gone.

It was a spooky night in the town of ghostville. I carefully strolled through Griffin park as the owls hooted and wolves howled. As I came through the back gates a loud shriek filled the sky. I stopped dead in my tracks. I saw a wing fly past a willow tree. All of a sudden a large shadow occurred over me. I turned around to see a vampire burst toward me wanting blood. I ran as fast as I could, my house was very near. I made it up to my door but it was too late, I was gone.

Over the weeks room 17 has been doing 100 word story's. Here is one I did.

Lucy was 12 years old when she lived in India. One day as Lucy walked home from school a large man walked up to her and picked her up. Lucy was knocked out and woke in a cellar surrounded by many other children. She was shocked to see at the end of the long thin hall a noose hung. Lucy knew she had to escape and tell dad. At the back of the cellar was a small crack of light. Every 5 hours the big man delivers her a plate of food. Lucy was going to smash out with that plate.

Parts of speech poem

This my poem about a butterfly using parts of speech.

My genius hour is going on track. Yesterday I took the results the FunZone kids gave me and looked at what I could do to make my smoothies nicer and cheaper. I also started designing some logo's. Here are some designs, tell me what is best. No.4 Middle left, No.5 Middle Right
             No.2                                                    No.1
               V                                                          V               

Labels

I                     

                                    No.3                                                         

Friday was the Young Writers Conference in Wellington. We were the only school there however some individuals went. At the conference we were taught by professional authors and audio editors. We were taught about world building, character making and the plot of a story.    
                                                                                                             V
                                                                                                            ME